By: Amanda Worth, MA
You started playing when you were young. At first, it was something you did. Over time, it became something you were.
You became:
A player.
A teammate.
An athlete.
Maybe people knew you as โthe athleteโ. Maybe you knew yourself that way, too. Then one day, you put on your jersey, uniform, or ballet shoes for the last time.
Finding a New Identity
Your identity can have many factors: how you perceive yourself, as well as how others perceive you. It can be easy to use our accomplishments or interests as identifiers of who we are. Who are you after the game ends?
Throughout your life, you will experience transitions that can cause you to reflect on who you were, who you are, and who you want to be.
You may ask yourself:
- What happens when the identity that once gave me purpose, belonging, confidence, and structure changes?
- I know who I am when Iโm an athlete. But who am I when Iโm not?
- If I don’t play anymore, will others still like me? What will others think? What will I think of myself? Will I still be successful?
- What if my worth has become connected to my performance?
Transition & Grief
The transition out of sports isnโt simply a change in your schedule. It can change how you spend your time, who you spend it with, what you work toward, and how you see yourself. Research suggests that athletic retirement not only shifts identity but can also lead to a loss of social networks, career ambitions, and may carry physical and mental health risks (Voorheis et al., 2023).
When transitioning out of sport, an athlete can experience grief that is complicated by mixed emotions, identity changes, and uncertainty about what comes next. Grief after a tremendous loss is common and can be experienced differently.
As an athlete, you may have time to accept retirement by having a plan; others may find the transition difficult or be forced to retire due to injury or a change in performance. In either scenario, one can experience immense grief. Grief doesnโt follow a predictable timeline. You may feel relieved one day and angry the next. You may feel ready to move forward and then unexpectedly miss the locker room, the competition, your teammates, or simply the feeling of being part of something.
You can know that leaving was the right decision and still grieve what youโre leaving behind.
Grief after the sport ends can look like:
- Feeling disconnected from yourself
- Loss of confidence
- Sadness or irritability
- Anxiety about the future
- Loss of structure
- Loss of belonging
- Loss of activity
- Comparing your current self to your athletic self
- Questioning your purpose
Looking Ahead
Haslam et al. (2024) identified three themes that contribute to identity disruption during and after the transition to retirement: 1) the role of identity and self-categorizations in shaping performance, 2) adjusting to identity loss based on whether an individual held multiple or exclusive identities, and 3) attempts to re-anchor identity by searching for and actively repurposing new identities. These themes can be used to better understand the complexities of identity change associated with retirement.
Sports or performance may have taught you discipline, drive, loyalty, confidence, resilience, and skills that extend far beyond the field, court, rink, pool, stage, or track.
Those qualities donโt disappear when sport ends. They come with you.
Ask yourself:
- What did my sport teach me?
- How has being an athlete helped me develop into the person I am today?
- What does being a former athlete mean to me?
- Who am I beyond sports?
- How can I use these skills in new areas of my life?
Take the time to reflect on these questions because the game has taught you more than scoring points. You have learned collaboration, communication, commitment, and concentration. These are all skills you can continue to use outside of sports.
Maybe you donโt have to leave the athlete behind.
The discipline, resilience, relationships, confidence, and lessons you developed through sport are still part of you.
You are still the person who learned to work through difficulty or under pressure.
You are still the person who learned how to be part of a team.
You are still the person who learned how to lose, recover, and try again.
Your identity may be changing, but that doesnโt mean you have lost yourself.
Being an athlete is part of your story, but it is not the whole story. Maybe the next chapter isnโt about figuring out who you are without your sport.
Itโs about discovering who you are beyond it.
References
Haslam, C., McAulay, C., Cooper, D., Mertens, N., Coffee, P., Hartley, C., Young, T., La Rue, C. J., Haslam, S. A., Steffens, N. K., Cruwys, T., Bentley, S. V., Mallett, C. J., McGregor, M., Menke, D. J., & Germany, M. L. (2019). Reconstructing Athletic Identity: College Athletes and Sport Retirement. Journal of Loss and Trauma, 24(1), 17โ30. https://doi.org/10.1080/15325024.2018.1522475
Roberts, K., Kuhlman, K., Byrd, M., & Hunt, T. (2023). The Influence of Athletic Identity on Mental Health Symptoms During Retirement From Sport. Journal of sport rehabilitation, 32(5), 630โ634. https://doi.org/10.1123/jsr.2022-0362
Voorheis, P., Silver, M., & Consonni, J. (2023). Adaptation to life after sport for retired athletes: A scoping review of existing reviews and programs. PloS one, 18(9), e0291683. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0291683
Williams, D., & Fransen, K. (2024). “I’m more than my sport”: Exploring the dynamic processes of identity change in athletic retirement. Psychology of sport and exercise, 73, 102640. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psychsport.2024.102640
